time to be heard.

yesterday i had an extraordinary encounter: someone read my aura. she told me all about my life, my challenges, my gifts. in exact detail. i've never been read in this way and it was eerie as hell. it was equally fascinating.

let me preface the story with the observation over the last year that i've had trouble with my voice, with being heard. i'd recently talked with my sister about it and mom and i have discussed it a number of times.

i'd spent the day selling my work in little rock at the river market. i met loads of people and one of them, upon seeing that i was from hot springs, said she had left there because the energy was too intense for her. she's a massage therapist and healer. i told her of someone i'd met through the hot springs farmer's market - who did reiki. when i told her the woman's name, her eyes lit up and she said "she's awesome". frankly, i didn't even know what reiki was until i looked it up while writing this blog entry. shameful, i know.

this woman (the reiki woman), at a party i went to last week, handed me some crystals (i don't know which ones) to see if i responded to the energy they allegedly contained. i did. i felt vibrations through my throat but was unsure if it was from the crystals or from the intense scrutiny i was getting from the small gallery of people awaiting my reaction. i put it down to a little of both.

it was an interesting enough experience that i asked her to let me know when she was holding a beginner's class on crystals. the area here is rich with them and i love information. i used to study crystals a bit, once upon a time. i have a tiny burlap bag of specially chosen crystals that i carry when i travel. i got them before i spent my summer in france in 1998. i no longer remember what they are or why i specially chose them, but i carry them all the same.

back to the river market. as we talked, i briefly relayed the story about holding the crystals to the woman i'd just met. i didn't tell her any details of what i felt. she asked me if i wanted her to read my aura. i responded with an enthusiastic yes - i'd often wondered about auras (as i wonder about so many things). i stood back, unsure of what to do with my hands. she looked around, past, through me. her eyes are piercing brown. i watched her watch me. and i waited. suddenly, she stepped back, shook her head a bit and said "wow". wow?????? that's when she told me that i hold a lot of what's keeping me back in my throat. she said i need to honor my voice and who i am at a deeper level. that i'm a healer. she had goosebumps when she told me that we are sisters. she laid her palms on mine and the vibrations were so intense. it was amazing, amazing, amazing. she said many other things - about specific life experiences i've had and specific experiences on my current path. i actually fought tears as she spoke - it was surprising.

truly, i don't know what to say about any of it except that it was extraordinary. it was eye-opening (third eye, if what this woman said is true). i just looked up the chakras and see that the throat chakra's function is communication and creativity. interesting. i've been feeling my creativity soar as my communication has declined. it's time for balance, i think, of these things. the woman from hot springs had told me that people do not end up here by accident. that we are drawn here. in light of the year i've had since i arrived, i'm inclined to agree.